Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Planning my funeral (no I am not dying)

An ice storm devoured the area as hundreds of people trekked to the tiny little town in Southern Illinois. The traditional church with light beaming from the stained glass windows beckoned people inward as they came to pay their last respects.

The memorial service was short, but then the mic was opened to talk about Mike...
People queued up and starting sharing story after story.
One gentleman even focused his tribute on "I want to be like Mike."
I sat there and watched the scene play out and thought how senseless it was at this point; Mike was no longer here to hear the accolades. I made up my mind then and there, at the ripe old old of 32 that from that point on, I would not have these regrets that others were having this blustery evening.
I embarked on a journey to tell people how I feel about them, while they were alive and kicking.
Several years later, a dear friend named Myra was facing her last battle with cancer. We all knew. Well, some of gathered together and decided to throw a "Celebration of Myra" party.

Again, it was an inclement wintry eve and about a hundred people journeyed weathered the storm.  The mic was open up on the podium, friends lined up and started to share anecdotes, poems, cards and simple heart felt emotions. This evening was much different as Myra was there with us to hear us tell her just what she meant to each and every one of us. She was always an humble women of such grace, she was a bit embarrassed by this display of love and admiration. But, I can tell you, she know that night how much she was loved. When she died a few months later, there were no regrets for the people that had joined in the celebration of her life.
Why am I sharing these stories? Today I am sharing a little bit of what I have learned on my life journey. One thing for sure, if I love you, you know it beyond a shadow of a doubt!
When I intentionally titled this about planning my funeral, I probably should have said, I would really prefer NOT to have a funeral service. Oh, I know it's supposed to be for those who are left here on earth, for comfort. But honestly, I would rather know today - to be told how they feel and what they think. Spent the time with me now. This is a very personal part of my journey that really breaks my heart, which I won't go into further detail. Just know that at times Perky Prepping Gramma isn't always perky.
If you get anything out this post today, tell people how you feel about them while they are still with you. Don't wait until it is too late & live life with regrets.


  1. Excellent reminder to us all. My mother passed away suddenly at the age of 48. From the day she died to present, I never leave a friend without a hug, a kiss on their cheek and an "I Love You." It's amazing how many people pick up on this, when it happens, and are now doing the same. Life is short, friends and loved ones are gifts and we should let them know how much we love and appreciate them.
    My mother died on her way to the grocery store -- felt perfectly fine when she left, had just enough time to turn the car off, and died of a heart attack. She had been to the doctor(s) about two weeks prior for a full and complete physical. Everything came back with good/excellent results - "as healthy as a horse."
    We never know when our time or that of our friends/loved ones is over. My husband and I never even go to the store without stopping what we are doing to kiss and hug each other and tell them how much "I Love You" - people are always a little shocked at this, but if we aren't together and one of us leaves this earth, the other one knows that the last words to each other was "I Love You" and they felt the embrace of that love with a good healthy hug.
    I'm totally with you on your thoughts and that is exactly how I feel about funerals. I have not been to one since my Mother died.
    Thanks for sharing your thoughts and part of your personal journey with me. I honestly and truly appreciate it deeply. Hugs - Bobbie :)

  2. Your post is very inspiring, as it is an eye-opener for anyone who reads this to live their life to the fullest. It is important to live every day productively and fruitfully, spend time with friends and family, and don’t let time go to waste. Live every day as if it is your last day without any regrets and unfinished businesses.

    Chastity Gamboa @ Usher Funeral Home